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One thing you must not say to a child


ijfamily

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Kids can pull off the hairs from your very skull if you let them throw you off guard. Some childish behaviors are so irritating that you may find yourself reacting in a most unbelievable manner to a childish provocation. Some parents throw every caution to the winds when they are angry with their kids; they call them all kinds of undeserving names and tell them all sorts of things, in a bid to vent their anger.

There is no excuse for wrong behavior and, using abusive language is a type of wrong behavior. Therefore you have no excuse whatsoever to be abusive when talking to a child. But in case you're already addicted to it and cannot but speak the wrong words and make the wrong statements when you're angry, there's one statement you should never make to a child. You must not say it to a child no matter how angry or bitter you are. What statement is that? Never say to a child: "You're are good for nothing." Please don't ever say it to them. That singular statement is enough to ruin the life of a child. It unconsciously transmits a sense of worthlessness into a child. Permit me to say it again; don't ever tell a child that they are good for nothing.

Shalom.

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It breaks my heart when I hear people tell their children that they are "dumb" or "worthless".  No kind of behavior could ever warrant that type of response to anyone, let alone a child.  What parents who say things like that fail to realize is how much and how deep of an impact their words have on the child.  No child will ever forget such words and will carry the weight of them well into adulthood.  I've known adults who recall parents saying similar things and the looks on their faces were as if the emotional wound was as fresh as the day they heard them.

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Never call a child a "bad kid" otherwise they are going to continue being a bad kid because that is what they think they are, instead say that they are making bad choices witch will make them  think about what choices they have made and hopefully change them. You can't change who you are but you can change what choices you make. I would never call my child anything that is going to break his self confidence, Us adults are supposed to build their self confidence 

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A lot of trouble arises from parents who don't think, and from thinkers who don't work. Real smart parents work hard at building character in their loved children at all times.

Good post! Thanks.

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I can write from my personal experience. I always ask my husband to go for a walk or go take a cold shower when he's feeling nervous and he thinks that our daughter is the cause for his feelings. When i personally deal with situation when i feel like throwing the towel while being with my kids, i just keep it internally and try to figure out why i feel tensed and be conscious that these are my kids and i'm 100% responsible of their future behavior and emotional balance and this usually happens in a matter of seconds:).

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I can't imagine being so upset about anything my kid says that I'd insult or berate them that way. I agree with your sentiment, no one should speak to kids that way. But I'd love to challenge the idea that a healthy, mentally balanced adult would be so distraught by the words of a child that they allow themselves to devolve into such nastiness.  I think most parents are probably more mature than that. But I could be wrong. I have 6 kids and our home is happy. When my kids say something that bugs me, I usually just ask them to clarify. Quite often, they are just miscommunicating and it's my job to guide them toward explaining themselves better. Have you heard the cliche "Communication is 10% what you say and 90% what they hear."  We should expect kids to bumble through life a bit, it's their job. I can't imagine getting so angry about that.

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I found this topic interesting because is about children , about future.

I am not a father, but i work with children. Sometimes is hard to take care of them , sometimes they get you upset and sometimes they can be so unbeliveble cute.  In all the situations, never say to a kid "Don't do it !" because, they will always do it, simple becasue they are curious about everything and a "NO"  will always motivate them to do the thing. I found situations like "You can do it if you want , but someone will get hurt!" when you work to they fears and they will not do it because they`re scared.

In conclusion: Do not impose something to a child just make him/her understand the situation, do not think "Is to young to understand this" because they surprise us all everyday with theyre smartness.

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  • 1 year later...

One thing you must not ever say to a child is "You are stupid!" because now, I am parenting a 17 year old with the help of my mother. I think of when my daughter was about 6 years old and I was angry to the point of belittling her with the word stupid, but I controlled my temper and did not let it come out of my mouth. Never call your kids stupid or dumb is my advice to all parents in this world.

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My experience was a sad one. Not able to perform my early morning duties as usual, my mom grew angry, she said some nasty things like "you are a very lazy child. You don't like  work". now I objected telling her not to say such, instead let others say it.As my mother, all I need is her encouragement with the little  service I render despite my busy schedule.

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