We Cannot Always Think Positive

[InannaM]

When times are hard and we find ourselves in difficult situations, we are encouraged to "think positive", or find the good in each situation. This is supposed to keep us from falling into despair, and it can be a useful strategy in many cases. However, there are just some instances in which we should just allow ourselves to look at the situation for what it is because there sometimes is just nothing positive about it! This is not to say that it is okay to wallow in defeat; we must still try to create a better ending or at least not allow ourselves to become permanently maladjusted by the experience. We have evolved to experience a range of emotions for a reason. Some of those emotions may seem harmful to us, particularly when they trigger feelings of hopelessness or dejection, or persist for so long that we find ourselves in a state of depression. However when we reach our lowest states, we have nowhere else to go but up. We grow and evolve from having reached our lowest points, and achieve wisdom from it. How do we do that if we are denying ourselves the authenticity of our emotions by forcing optimism?

[WriterCat]

What you risk by not thinking positive, and I know because I've been there, is being trapped in despair. Humans are really good at looking at the negative side of things and that's not to say that there isn't a time and place to consider the negative. However, you don't want to think too deeply about the negative or else you'll be unable to move based the negative and make a positive.

On the other hand, you also need to focus on a realistic positive. If you are depressed, think everyone hates you, feel like you make a negative difference in the world, ect., trying to tell yourself that, "You are the best person that has ever walked the planet!" or "You are smart and likable with unimaginable potential!" will be counterproductive. First, you'll block it out as false, because it is, at least according to you. Second, it'll actually remind you why you are the wore person that has walked the planet, you aren't smart, and that nobody likes you, which will just make things worse. 

It's a much better plan, at the very least, to acknowledge the negative thought with the addition of, "I am not going to think about that again," or, "We are moving on from that now." 

All this to say, take as much positivity as you can so you don't get trapped into negativity but also keep the positively realistic and believable.